Monday, February 14, 2011

Looking for love in all the right places- Happy Valentine's day...

So today is Valentine’s day..that dreaded day for so many who feel alone and are alone on this day of supposed romance and chocolate…



It is almost impossible to ignore all those romantic messages everywhere you look; roses and champagne here, sunset kisses there, scenes of romantic dinners and walks everywhere you turn…I even see scenes like this on my little remote island here in the south of thailand…go figure..



Hallmark Cards has a monopoly on this day and my hats off to every single marketing exec who had a part in this so-called “holiday” that claims to celebrate love and romance…


But for the majority of the planet, this is just another day-and another day spent with the same stresses of yesterday and with the hopes of a perhaps better tomorrow…

And for someone like me , here on a tiny island in the south of Thailand, this was just another day but made more full and alive because I made a choice….



That’s right. I made a choice not to get sucked up in this whole notion that if you are “alone" , there is something wrong with you or something to be sad about. No siree-I woke up this morning refusing to go “down” in any way whatsoever…Hallmark was not going to trap me nor was any kissing couple on the beach or champagne bottle I heard popping in the distance.

Today was going to be a day about giving love back to me, something I know I forget to do quite often. And I sense I am not alone on this one..



So today became a day of remembering a great lesson-and I was inspired by a Buddhist quote that I came across just a few days ago :

‎"You can explore the universe looking for somebody who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, 
and you will not find that person anywhere..."



As hard as that is for me (and I suspect a few others)to swallow, this quote is correct in every way…

I think most of us going through so much of our lives searching for love, truth , and happiness in every way and every place and person possible. We want to believe that “this place” or “that person” or “that thing” is going to complete us, make us whole, make us feel love like we have never experienced before…


It is all for naught.

Really, it is . I feel like I could write a book at this point ( and maybe I will) about the dozens of times I felt like I found “it” in my life through a person, place, or experience I had…but it is all transient;

everything comes and goes in life- even love , even life…

And the only thing I have found that is constant is the love you can give yourself-that inner “best friend” that can make you laugh, pick you up, cradle you when you need it most and when you feel no one else is around…



So to all of you who have taken the time to read this, I say to you 3 words:
“Love yourself first"-it is not selfish, wrong, or hurtful..it sounds clichéd, used too frequently in new age tapes and books, but it is a truth that cannot be overlooked…pain and suffering will just ensue otherwise…

And as I pop open my bottle of “valentine” champagne tonight, I will make a toast to all of you…



And to me-for just taking the time to try and “get it”…..

Happy valentines day- may you always feel the love within you shining and smiling upon your soul.

5 comments:

Rick said...

Exacltly so Melina.

Matt said...

Lots of Love from Hawaii, Melina... we all miss you.

melina said...

thanks for taking the time to read my blog, Matt...hope you and Kirsten are doing great ! big hugs to you both :)

Cheryl Lindley said...

Spot on, dear! Hard to do sometimes, but so very true. Happy trails!

Ageliki Aravoglou said...

my wise cuz,...every word you wrote is soo true...now about that book...It s a great idea<3Love you<3